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The Morning After Pill: berstreet Edition.

October 15, 2009

The Morning After Pill is our daily recap of the goings on in the sporting world. Certain teams and sports are left out due to either lack of caring or an extreme hangover. Maybe a weak hangover also, we’re kind of soft like that.

NFL: Percy Harvin of the Minnesota Vikings has not been practicing due to a bum shoulder.  They won’t say which one it is, but the LITE FM radio station that was on while I was getting my teeth cleaned said they thought it was his left.  What will the mean for the Vikings when facing the Ravens this weekend at Mall of America Field (are you F’ing kidding me, btw?)?  Only time will tell.  That and the pregnancy test your girlfriend took.

College Football: Last night Boise St. played Tulsa.  I know this, because I had that game on while I was failing at doing work from home.  Boise St. trounced Tulsa for pretty much the whole game, until the 4th when Tulsa made a comeback.  But the comeback kids didn’t come hard enough, because they still lost to Boise St. 28-21.  On the plus side, this time the announcers didn’t ramble on for 10 minutes about whether or not it’s pronounced “Boi-ZEE” or “Boi-SEE”, so they completely saved me from stabbing myself in the face.

Girls’ College Soccer: So on some channel I didn’t know I had, there was a rerun (not Rerun from the Cosby Kids, mind you) of the Rice-Memphis game from the 11th.  Apparently Rice pulled the big upset over Memphis, which is pretty cool I guess.  Why do you care about this? Because some of the soccer girls are smokin’ hot.

"I would play with your balls anytime, teehee"

"I would play with your balls anytime, teehee"

My brother goes to UMD and he says their soccer team is really hot.  I don’t know.  I haven’t had my tea yet.  And I know this is not Girls’ College Soccer-related, but David Beckham is super hot.  And he plays soccer.  Just puttin’ it out there.

NHL: The Minnesota Wild have lost something like 85 million games in a row.  Which is pretty amazing, because I wondered if 85 million hockey games have been played in the history of ever – clearly they have.  I don’t really care about hockey that much, but Gally is Canadian and that’s pretty much all they have left in the world.  That and their Monopoly money.

Can you make change for a $20, Eh?

Can you make change for a $20, Eh?

MLB: So baseball is still happening, right?  Tonight we have the Dodgers vs. the Phillies.  Which is really like the Dodgers vs. All of Philadelphia, and they’d better hope they don’t get pissed on or beat up.  Joe Torre, who looks like this:



gave Clayton Kershaw the start. Apparently this is a big deal, because Kershaw will be the 3rd youngest starter in postseason history.  So basically, it’s not a big deal at all cuz that’s like being the 9th best at badminton – who cares?  I guess tomorrow night is game one of the ALCS and ESPN felt it important to report that Lackey will be starting against the Yankees.  All I know is, GO TORII HUNTER!!!  GO ANGELS!! Logic and his stupid Yankees can go to Hell.  Yankees fans are not real baseball fans, and anyone who says otherwise is going to make me crabby.

The people below are far more competent than I am when it comes to morning recaps.  But tell them I sent you, so that way they will buy me a present.

Sportress of Blogitude’s Wake n’ Blog

The Phoenix Pub’s Eye Opener

Thank you for your time.  I love you.

xoxo berstreet

6 Comments leave one →
  1. October 15, 2009 9:17 am

    I don’t follow hockey for a reason. Why are you fawning over soccer girls? I mean, I’m VERY interested as to why. Harvin is a stud, aside from his penchant for migrains, injuries, sticky greens and emotional outbursts. I’d still take him on my team all day long.

    • October 15, 2009 9:24 am

      Are you complaining about a girl fawning over other girls? That’s the stuff threesomes are made of good sir.

    • October 15, 2009 9:33 am

      #1: Harvin is my favorite. I’m a huge Gators fan for like the last 10 years. So imagine my freak-outage when we drafted him.

      #2: I love to appreciate hot girls. I like strip clubs, cuz the female body is hot. Unless you go to Choice or 418 – that’s disappointing. And hot female athletes are a huge bonus. Don’t be so judgey!

      • October 15, 2009 9:36 am

        /raises glass to berstreet and wipes away a tear

  2. diddy permalink
    October 17, 2009 12:14 pm

    If you were listening to LITE FM radio while getting your teeth cleaned means the dentist from your childhood really did retire, which is very sad. Because you know that if he were still practicing the office would have been playing some badass Method Man or Redman.

    • October 17, 2009 3:48 pm

      I feel like I can’t even talk about him retiring. I’m not kidding when I say I cried when I got the letter. They always had KQ or Cities 97 on!

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