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The Morning After Pill: Wakin’ Up Sexy with gimp Edition

October 9, 2009

The Morning After Pill is where we review the previous day in the sporting world. Certain sports/teams are left out due to extreme lack of caring or hangovers

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Headbanging coffee cup for a head guy? Headbanging coffee cup for a head guy. My day can begin…

College Football

Thursday Night brought us a conference college football match-up between Nebraska and Missouri Yawn. Sloppy field conditions and even sloppier play saw the ol Cornhuskers down 12-0 going into the 4th quarter. That is until Bo Pelini and company decided to quit fucking around and put up 27 points. Which is good news if you’re a Cornhusker fan, bad news if you (ie me) bet on Mizzou.

MLB

It’s almost that time of the year when baseball hibernates for the winter. Bows head Thank god. However, first we must make it through the playoffs. Last night saw 3 games take place, none of which I watched because I was too busy drinking looking for a cure to cancer…Yes cancer research. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. At least if my sponsor asks.

The Cardinals find themselves down 2 games to the Dodgers and Manny’s awesomely dirty looking dreads. Matt Holliday apparently had a costly error according to Twitter. I would have known firsthand if I had no life and watched baseball actually gave a shit.

Colorado tied up their series with the Phillies after a 5-4 victory. In other news makes wanking motion.

In boring playoff news the Angels brought out the rapesticks last night, shutting out the Red Sox 5-0. Normally I would be ecstatic, maybe even orgasmic after seeing Boston lose. However, I would prefer to enjoy the dismay of Boston fans after the Phillies and Yankees (suck it Logic!) are eliminated from the playoffs. Or in the case that the Phillies win the whole goddamn thing, a huge fucking meteor hits whatever stadium they’re in when they receive the championship trophy.

If the broken spirits of baseball fans could be served up as a meal my feast of dismay would look something like this:

Appetizer
Philly Cheese Steak

Main Course
New York Strip

Dessert
Boston Creme Pie

Kinda made myself hungry there. My Bloody Mary will have to wait…

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. lowercase permalink
    October 9, 2009 6:52 am

    One of my favorite things ever in the sports world is watching the Yankees lose in October. They take it worse than they did when they didn’t make the playoffs last year. Sending “the yankees lose, thaaaaaaa yankees lose” text messages is NEVER NOT FUNNY. I’d send it to my buddies if they were carrying their mother’s coffins at the moment the game ended.

    But as a Rockies fan, I’d really rather the Twins or Angels take care of it, because that team scares the shit out of me if/when the Rockies play them in the series.

    • October 9, 2009 3:22 pm

      As a Rockies fan, I hope your mountain is actually a volcano. The end.

      Sincerely,

      A Yankees Fan.

  2. October 9, 2009 7:41 am

    Yankee tears do taste pretty sweet, as well as make for a good lubricant. At least that’s what Logic’s girlfriend tells me. Ba-zing!

    • October 9, 2009 3:23 pm

      Why’d you have to ask my g/f? You could’ve just asked your mom.

      Sincerely,

      A Yankees Fan.

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