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Morning After Pill

September 21, 2009

jonesnosepickNFL

The Detroit Lions still suck as they dropped another game 27-13, this time to the Minnesota Purple Jesuses. Adrian “Purple Jesus” Peterson started out slow, actually fumbling away a ball. He must have still been hung up on the fact that the Mormons of BYU lost the day before. They are God/Jesus’ team. But the team got on track and kept the Lions on their losing path.

The Redskins won in unimpressive fashion against the Rams 9-7. All I can say is thank god that I am not a Redskins fan nor living in a region where I would be subjected to their games on a regular basis…That would be painful.

The Cincinnati Bengals beat the Green Bay Packers 31-24, which isn’t that exciting…At least to me because I didn’t bet that game. However, what was exciting was after Chad Ochocinco scored a touchdown, he did the unthinkable. And by unthinkable he did exactly what he said he would do…The Lambeau Leap. Of course one Green Bay fan was unamused and flicked off the camera. Come on Packer fans, you’re better than that. You actually made me think for a second that I was watching a Jets game…Classy.Picture 1

If men who drive overly jacked up huge pick ups have tiny penises, then Jerry Jones must have an innie for a dick, based solely on the fact that his new stadium is so gigantic. Or at least that’s the impression I got when Collinsworth and Michaels kept making references to how big the stadium is compared to other landmarks like the Empire State Building, etc. I was really waiting for Collinsworth to drop in a “That’s what she said” at some point, but he totally disappointed. In other disappointing news the “debut” of the new Cowboys’ stadium was seen with a big L for the Boys, as they lost 33-31 to the Giants. Much to the chagrin of Logic…and my bookie. Fuckers.

Sure other things happened yesterday, but I could care less to report them here. Google it yourself you lazy bastards…Hmm did anything else happen? Oh yeah Jerry Jones was caught picking his nose on TV. Video is below.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Jeez Jerry you’re rich, couldn’t you have just paid someone to do it for you instead?

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