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Morning After Pill

September 11, 2009

Here’s what happened in sports last night while you were either sleeping, not paying attention or huffing paint and dreaming of the Nightman.

NFL: The season opened with an OT game between the Steelers and the Titans. Even though both teams put up over 300 yards of offense, it wasn’t an exciting game. The Titans D looked legit as it held the vaunted Steelers ground game to 36yds on 22 carries. They also sacked Big Ben 4 times and had 2 interceptions. The final score was 13-10 for Pittsburgh, but the big story was Troy Polamalu. He suffered what is being called a sprained MCL and is expected to be out 3-6 weeks, though further testing will be done. The Raiders have given Richard Seymour 5 days to report to the team or face being fined/suspended. My math might be a little rusty, but that gives him until after the first game played by Oakland. I’m guessing he wants to see what kind of debacle he’s headed for.

College Football: College Football had a great game last night. Georgia Tech jumped out to a 21-0 lead over Clemson. Clemson rallied to bring it to 24-21, before ultimately succumbing to GT 30-27. They got the ball back with about a minute left, but couldn’t get it done.

MLB: The Rockies are still on fire. Even without star SS Troy Tulowitzky for the third straight game, they won their 7th straight game 5-1 over the Reds to increase their lead for the NL wild card. This is like that year that they went to the playoffs while winning something like 9000 out of 9004 games. Is baseball ever going to be over.

Yeah, why not?

Yeah, why not?

NBA: The Ref’s are negotiating for a new contract. It isn’t going so well. They expect to be locked out when the exhibition games start Oct 1. The Ref’s in the NBA are all phonies anyways. They push for whatever matchups the league wants when playoff time rolls around anyways, so why not just hire some good actors or hot women to be the Refs and relegate the NBA to WWE status. It might even help the ratings out.

US. Open: The quarterfinal matchup between Rafael Nadal and Fernando Gonzalez was both delayed and postponed by rain. Yes, that’s all that was news worthy.

NHL: The bizarre case of the Coyotes continues. The judge presiding over the case said that maybe neither of the remaining parties could take possession of the team. The Stanley Cup Champion Pittsburgh Penguins(blah) made a visit to The White House to meet and be congratulated by President Obama. They presented him with an honorary jersey, number 44. What took this so long, was Obama busy or something? Oh and my hometown Edmonton Oilers came to terms on a one year contract with local player Mike Comrie. What the fuck? We rightly ran that bum out of town years ago. He comes in to play the exact same position and put up the exact same amount of points as about 6 guys already on the team. I didn’t realize that a winning strategy was to have a top notch goalie, two #1 offensive defensemen, 1 skilled forward and 12 third line guys. But hey he brings this with him, and I’m totally going to grind on her one night.

No longer Jail Bait.  Score.

No longer Jail Bait. Score.

Or you know, fail hilariously trying.

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